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Fairly Odd Mother

Frantically waving my magic wand to make wishes come true.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Leaving on a Jet Plane

Two of Belly's favorite people, little six-year-old girls she met last year in preschool, are moving.

For one, it is a done deal---they will be halfway across the country by June. The other family has their house on the market, but no real plans as to where they will go if it sells. All I know is that they want outta here.

I'm sad about this for two reasons: one, I really like the moms and the girls. But the bigger of the two reasons is that I know Belly will be crushed. Tonight, I tried to broach the subject with her but her eyes grew big and filled with tears as she choked out, "But, I will never see them again!"

The sad thing is that she is probably right.

When I was young, it was I who did the moving. Before I was eight, I had lived in four states. I don't recall very much about this time except that the people from the first three states do not factor very much into my present-day memory. Once we moved, we were gone. Sure, I pen-palled with one friend for a few years, but our lives went in such different directions that these letters were more like stories about a shadowy person in a faraway land.

Since the age of eight, though, I've held onto my friends fiercely. I have very few relatives, so friends were my family. I've known some for over thirty years and know we'll be friends for thirty more. And, this is even with miles and miles separating us; with years, not months, passing between visits.

Unfortunately for Belly, she is too young to be able to initiate much correspondence. At her age, I assume she will be sad and hurt when her friends leave, will talk on the phone with them for a little while and then they will fade away. I hope not, but that seems like a more logical conclusion than any others I can invent, such as the thought that maybe, just maybe, she'll be giggling with one, or both, of them at the age of 30, reminiscing about their days together when they were six.

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Blogger Blog Antagonist said...

Oh, poor thing. I sure feel for her! I vividly remember moving at the age of six and losing my best friend in the whole world. I hope it's not too rough for her and she finds someone to take that special place in her heart.

5:51 AM  
Blogger Whirlwind said...

Oh I know how that is.

When Einey was TWO her best friend (and mine - we knew them from birthing class) moved away to VT. We have kept in touch by visiting each other and through mail/email/phone calls. Then about A year ago- they moved again to VA. We haven't been down to see them, but they still call and we both still call each other. Recently, they moved AGAIN, to a different part of VA (we keep joking about how much they move). In fact I just mailed out a welcome to the new house/Easter box for them.

Before they moved originally, we made them a scrapbook (with other friends too) about their time here. They loved it and Einey's friend still looks at her friends here. She doesn't remember most, but she does remember my daughter.

I can't say it isn't hard, Einey still has days where she misses her friend and ants to see her, it just isn't a quick 4 hour drive anymore :( And she constantly asks if we can move to VA (leaving all her other friends but hey, it is her Best Friend).

I can only hope they still remember each other when they are older, even if they can't remember all the fun they share without the help of pictures.

Can Belly make a book for her friend (and herself) of pictures of them together? Maybe they can use email t okeep in touch?

6:07 AM  
Blogger OhTheJoys said...

I still have one friend that I made that young...

I think that it will be hard, but I've heard they bounce back quickly. I don't know if it is true...

9:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

FOM, I have been there and done that. E's best friend moved to PA last year and left her heart broken. It will be a year in June,oh I know this is not at all helpful, but she still cries for her friend, tells me how its just not the same with out P, what about the snow ball fights? (TG for no snow) what about the swimming pool, and sprinkler.
It's sad because at 5 or 6 years old, they are old enough to have formed wonderful friendships, a friendship that would have lasted through adulthood. I am sure of it. But now, we get an occassional email, phone call and Holiday Card. That's it.

My only way to comfort her is to tell her that if they are meant to be friends then they will reconnect again some day, some way. His dad and E's dad are alumn of the same college so who knows. Maybe they will catch up to each other in college.

Poor Belly! And Poor Mommy too! This is going to be a tough thing to get through but alas you both will get through it, maybe during the time that the friends are moving, you could schedule a few extra play dates.

12:58 PM  
Blogger Chicky Chicky Baby said...

Poor baby! It's not easy to lose a friend at any age but at her age it's particularly hard.

On the bright side, there's always email! :)

2:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man. That sucks. Being a few years younger than you, I don't really remember much about our previous homes and less about the people there. For me, it's hard to imagine living our whole lives here-- since we've moved so much before kids. But I also remember those kids in school who relocated mid-year and seemed lost coming in to a new setting. Ack.

Kisses to Belly. She's wise beyond her years, which won't be easy for her, as she knows these friends will drift away. Very sad...

2:49 PM  
Blogger nuttnbunny said...

Poor sweet Belly.

So glad to be back in the blogging world. Your musical experiences are truly impressive!!

8:39 PM  
Blogger Jeni said...

so sad.

such is life, huh?

10:59 AM  
Blogger Moments Of Mom said...

Ummm, you left a comment on my site about something bad you read. Can you send me a link. Should I be worried?


2:19 PM  
Blogger gingajoy said...

that is sad:( but i am always amazed by how resilient kids are. my son has moved on from in-home daycare and through several classes at daycare--all had real attachments for him, and many of those were lost. at this age they reform them so easily, you know?

3:20 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

It's much harder as a parent to deal with the child's inner feelings. I just wish they meet other friends too!

6:49 AM  
Blogger Kelly said...

That's quite sad, and I can relate. We're in the process of looking for a new home, and I dread the conversation with my preschooler about not being able to go to class with her friends any more.

12:23 PM  

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